Glass baby bottles used to be made with lighter-grade glass that could break, which is why plastic baby bottles became the norm. However, glass baby bottles have changed significantly and are now viewed as high-quality products. Many new parents are finding the benefits of using glass baby bottles and discovering why they might be the perfect choice for you and your baby.

Are Glass baby bottles safer than plastic? 

One of the big advantages of glass baby bottles is that they are free from potentially harmful chemicals. Unlike plastic bottles, which may contain BPA or other harmful substances, glass bottles offer a safe. Now, that’s not to say that all plastic baby bottles are harmful; there are many reputable companies! However, glass is, without question, the non-toxic option for feeding your baby. This means you can have peace of mind knowing that your little one isn’t being exposed to any unwanted chemicals during feeding time.

Are glass baby bottles durable? 

Yes, glass baby bottles have excellent durability. Unlike plastic bottles, glass bottles are less likely to scratch and retain odors, ensuring that each feeding is as fresh and clean as possible. 

Glass baby bottles are made from tempered glass. 

Glass baby bottles are made from tempered glass, so they aren’t made of regular glass that will shatter into tiny sharp shards. They are five times stronger than regular glass, and if they break (dropped from a height or at the right angle), they will break into glass chunks. 

Glass baby bottles, and silicone sleeves 

Many modern glass baby bottles are designed with these breakage concerns in mind. With the new silicone sleeves and other protective features, glass baby bottles are now more durable and easier to handle than ever before. So, when shipping for glass baby bottles, look for a protective silicone sleeve if you are still hesitant about breakage. 

Glass baby bottles are also microwave and dishwasher-safe, making them convenient for busy parents and caregivers. Plus, Baby Bottle Labels stick to them really well – and they’re also microwave, dishwasher, and sanitizer safe!

The benefits of glass baby bottles – they are better for the environment!

 Glass baby bottles are environmentally friendly. They can be reused and recycled. Although check with your local recycling facility; not everywhere has the heat capacity to recycle tempered glass, so you may need to find the nearest recycling facility near you, or better yet – pass down to another expectant mother!.

They help reduce the amount of waste generated by single-use plastic bags and bottles.  

Glass baby bottles maintain the taste of the milk or formula. 

Glass baby bottles are a great choice for parents who want to provide their little ones with the purest feeding experience. Unlike plastic, glass does not contain any chemicals that could potentially compromise the taste and quality of the milk or formula (not that this happens often, so don’t fret if you’re using high-quality plastic; you’re probably fine).

With glass baby bottles, there is no potential for this, so you know that the taste and quality of the milk or formula remain uncompromised, giving your baby the best feeding experience possible.

The cons of glass baby bottles – they are heavier.

One of the common concerns about glass baby bottles is their weight, and rightly so! Carrying a baby and a heavy diaper bag is enough; adding weight is a very legitimate concern for parents. Glass bottles are definitely heavier than plastic bottles, so take that into mind when making your choice. Perhaps glass for home, but a few plastic on-the-go bottles, too.   

Make the decision that’s best for you and your family. For some, the peace of mind that comes with using a safe and non-toxic material may outweigh the pain of the added weight.

Also, check with your childcare center to make sure they are okay with glass bottles. Very rarely, they may prefer you use plastic over glass.

Here is a list of the 10 best glass baby bottles in 2024. 

The big benefits of glass baby bottles are their safety and durability to their environmentally friendly nature and pure feeding experience, glass baby bottles definitely have a lot to offer. So, if you’re considering which type of baby bottles to use, give glass baby bottles a try and see the difference they can make in your baby’s feeding journey; good luck, the feeding journey can sometimes be a tricky one- here is a great list of the best bottle for babies who refuse a bottle

The post The Benefits of Using Glass Baby Bottles appeared first on The Mabelhood.

The twins are now 6 years old, and Erica practices pelvic health physiotherapy at Lifemark Physiotherapy. She estimates that at least half her clients are pregnant women or new moms seeking treatment post-delivery. Here, she answers some common questions about pregnancy’s effect on the area known as your “pelvic floor.”

What is the pelvic floor?

It’s a group of muscles in three layers, spanning the area between your sitting bones, pubic bone and tailbone. These muscles play an important role in:

• Holding up your pelvic organs (bowel, bladder and uterus)
• Providing continence (the ability to control elimination of urine and feces)
• Reaching orgasm
• Stabilizing your core
• Acting as a pump to remove lymphatic drainage

What is going to happen to my pelvic floor muscles when I’m pregnant?

Similar to a sling, the pelvic floor helps to support the developing baby within the pelvis. As fetal size and weight increases, this area gets challenged like never before. When the pelvic floor (and surrounding) muscles are not functioning to the best of their ability, an expectant mother may experience symptoms such as pubic bone pain, sacroiliac joint pain, hip pain, painful sex, perineal heaviness and incontinence.

Is there anything I can proactively do to prevent pelvic floor issues later?

Pelvic physiotherapy treatment can occur during pregnancy as long as there are no concerns with the placenta, the pregnancy is not deemed high-risk, and the attending midwife or obstetrician is in favour of it. Research shows that pelvic physiotherapy during pregnancy can help shorten the second stage of labor (the pushing stage), ease pregnancy-related pain and reduce the chances of urinary incontinence postpartum.

What about Kegel exercises?

A common misconception about pelvic floor physiotherapy is that it simply involves teaching women how to do a Kegel exercise properly. Kegels are useful, but they are not necessarily the answer to every problem. If your pelvic floor is tight and over-active, doing extra muscle contractions may actually make things worse. The goal is to achieve proper recruitment and balance of the pelvic muscles.

How long will it take for my pelvic floor to recover post-delivery?

Several factors will influence a mother’s recovery time, such as the number of babies delivered, duration of pushing, degree of tearing and medical interventions used (such as forceps, vacuum, episiotomy, or C-section). Each mother’s recovery and journey will be unique to her circumstances. A physiotherapist specializing in pelvic health will do an individualized assessment and create a customized program of exercises and/or stretches.

What are some signs that I should seek help for my pelvic floor?

Dysfunction of the pelvic floor muscles can cause a number of symptoms, including:

• Stress incontinence (leaking with sneezing, coughing or jumping)
• Urge incontinence (leaking after sudden urgency)
• Painful sex
• Pain in the perineum, tailbone, sacroiliac joints, hips or lower abdomen

Do I really need treatment, or is this just “the new normal” after having a baby?

Peeing your pants, though common after childbirth, is not something you have to live with. The same principle applies to ongoing pelvic pain, chronic back pain, or discomfort during sex several months postpartum. These issues can be treated, so please do not suffer in silence. When in doubt about your recovery and symptoms, always bring it up with your family doctor or gynecologist. As in other areas of motherhood, always trust your instincts.

Want to learn more? Check out this video on pelvic floor health after a Cesarean Birth with Pelvic Health Physiotherapist, Dr. Sinead Dufour:

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The post Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Your Pelvic Floor, But Were Afraid to Ask appeared first on The Mabelhood.

Andy has a point, though – the holidays are supposed to be a special and memorable time with the people we care about. How do we avoid getting bogged down in the to-do lists, stresses, obligations, and extra tasks that come with this month?

The answer is a modified “mini” version of self-care. We must do little things to keep our morale and spirits bright. No one has time for elaborate self-care indulgences, so we must get by on small doses. Elf-sized, if you will. Maybe “elf-care” would be a better term.

Self-care (even the mini kind) should be personalized, so do whatever works for you. If Christmas music and its repeating “pa-rum-pa-pum-pums” set your teeth on edge, then avoid that, for goodness’ sake. You need some small-scale tactics to try that will help you feel gratitude and enjoy the holiday spirit.

Holiday self-care tips for moms:

• Escape.

  Curling up with a good book may not be feasible at this time of year, but you can stash a festive magazine in your bag to flip through at your kids’ activities or while waiting for the school holiday concert to begin. Even if you don’t end up making that chocolate-candy cane bark recipe, it’s fun to look at the pictures.

• Breathe.

  You may not have time for a full-fledged yoga or meditation class, but a few deep breaths can go a long way. Once the kids are all buckled into the car, close the door and take 10 seconds to regroup before you get in. Turn toward the vehicle, lower your head, inhale, then exhale deeply, feeling your shoulders rise and fall. Repeat a couple of times until you feel calm (or until your passengers start yelling and banging on the window).

• Sip on the go.

  We’d rather be wrapped in a polar fleece blanket, sipping from a steaming mug of tea and watching the snow fall gently outside, but guess what? We’ve got errands. Treat yourself to a hot beverage from the drive-thru and savor it at every red light.

• Pause.

  If the universe hands you some unexpected bonus time, grab it. For example, your toddler falls asleep on the drive home and miraculously doesn’t wake up when you pull in. Stay in the car and cherish those few extra minutes to finish your coffee, listen to Christmas music on the radio, or have some quiet time.

• Sneak out.

  Get a hit of fresh air and vitamin D any way you can, especially on sunny days. At work, pretend you have to go outside to retrieve something from your car. Do a walking errand at lunch or take a short stroll around the block. Anything to brighten your day for a few minutes.

• Flashback.

  Are you stuck waiting in line? Scroll back in your phone’s photo gallery to find images or videos from last Christmas. It will remind you of last year’s special moments and memories and give you perspective on what really matters.

• Chill.

  You likely don’t have 90 free minutes to watch a beloved holiday movie with your kids. Still, when they’re watching and your favorite part comes on, drop what you’re doing and tune in. It might be just enough nostalgia to recharge your batteries before you continue the desperate search for your star-shaped cookie cutter.

• Reach out.

  Send a simple message (electronic, or snail mail – make it cute!) to someone who will really appreciate the warm holiday wishes. It might be someone who lives far away, who has lost someone this past year, or who is having a happy milestone, such as Baby’s First Christmas. It doesn’t take much, and it leaves both the sender and recipient feeling good.

• Scrub.

  To add a splash of holiday cheer to your morning routine, select a body wash or hand soap with a merry scent, such as candy cane, gingerbread, or pine.

• Set limits.

  In addition to coping at the moment, self-care can involve anticipating situations that cause undue stress and making the appropriate adjustments. If hosting a large dinner will cause you sleepless nights, have a brunch or potluck lunch instead. If being overbooked makes you feel frazzled, be selective when accepting invitations to parties or events.

This year, giving yourself these little pick-me-ups and micro-breaks might be just enough to keep you feeling jolly instead of Grinch-y. It is a wonderful time, and you deserve to enjoy it. Want even more? Check out more tips here! 

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The post 10 Holiday Self-Care Tactics You Might Actually Be Able To Achieve appeared first on The Mabelhood.

“It is a lot to handle for both the parent and child, no question,” says Callie Lecours, a kindergarten-based ECE with the Thames Valley District School Board (and a mother of two). “Try to take a deep breath and know that your child’s teaching team is there to make everyone feel safe and secure.”

While you’re practicing your calm and composed face for the big send-off, here are some dos and don’ts to help you through the early days (and weeks) of kindergarten.

Supplies and Gear

Do select a proper-sized backpack to carry all your child’s belongings. “A lunch bag, sweater, soiled clothes and mail bag won’t all fit in a small character backpack,” says Callie. While a larger one might seem massive, your little learner will gain self-confidence from being able to pack it herself. If you’re worried about the weight of it, use a kid-friendly wheeled suitcase instead.

Don’t buy school supplies unless you receive a list from the teacher. Items like pencils, crayons and notebooks may already be supplied in the classroom.

Do choose lunch containers and packages that your child can open independently. Practice at home in advance, including zipping/unzipping the lunch bag, opening/closing the water bottle, and putting any garbage in its proper place.

Don’t fall into the trap of buying indoor shoes that are cute and trendy but difficult to fasten. Velcro is the way to go.

Do send an extra set of clothes to be kept at school. “This is a new experience for them and they may have spills or bathroom accidents in the early going,” Callie says. She suggests sending practical clothes that are easy to put on, along with extra underwear and socks.

Don’t rely on a comfort object like a toy or stuffed animal to help your child start the school day. Items like this are usually discouraged in the classroom, because they may be damaged or have a distracting effect. Save the idea for show-and-tell or “special me” days.

Do label everything. In kindergarten, there is no such thing as over-labelling. Despite the colourful name plates adorning the room’s hooks and cubbies, it is inevitable that shoes, jackets, hats and other belongings will be jumbled together. By tagging everything with your child’s name, you’re lowering everyone’s stress and preventing things from being lost.

Drop-off and Pick-up

Do get there on time, or even better, a few minutes early. Everyone is nervous already, so cutting it close will raise anxiety levels even further. Organize your morning routine so you have ample time to get to the school and find your child’s line-up area without rushing.

Don’t linger after you say goodbye. Give him a hug and a cheerful wave as he goes in. Even though you feel like your heart is walking into the school without you, don’t follow him inside or try to peek in the window. It will only make things harder for everyone. Even if your child looked concerned or upset when you parted, trust that he didn’t stay that way all day – in fact, his tears probably cleared up in less than two minutes.

Do know the school policy about kindergarten drop-off and pick-up – typically, an adult must be present with the child until the “hand-off” occurs. Make sure the teachers and ECEs who are on duty at the end of the day are aware of all the relevant people (including grandparents and other caregivers) who may be collecting your child.

Communication

Do read every word of the welcome letter that the teacher sends home. It will have useful background information on classroom routines, basic supplies and most importantly, how to contact the teacher if you have questions or concerns.

Don’t overlook the monthly calendar. Put it on your fridge and immediately add any noteworthy dates – such as theme days, open houses, observation sessions, meet-the-teacher nights or other school events – to your digital schedule.

Do sign up for the class Twitter account, website or blog. If the school and school board have social media feeds, follow those to receive news of any transportation changes or weather-related closures.

Don’t forget to notify the school if your child is going to be absent or late. Know the school’s attendance and “safe arrival” procedures and follow them diligently.

Do get to know the ECEs and any other classroom helpers, as they can give you valuable first-hand insight about your child’s behaviour and mindset during the school day. “While we are not the classroom teachers, we do have a diploma specifically geared towards child development and are in tune with the various dynamics in the room,” Callie says. Since today’s kindergarten classes can have up to 30 students, the ECEs play an integral role in all parts of a kindergartener’s day.

The School

Do be friendly and courteous to the main office staff. If they seem busy, it’s because they are. They know everything that goes on in the school and can be a valuable resource as you find your way.

Don’t be shy about inquiring if your child’s classroom welcomes parent volunteers. Depending on your availability, you may be able to contribute to the class in some way, whether it’s supervising on a field trip or making homemade play-doh.

Do visit the school library with your child, if possible. Spend a few quiet minutes looking around and noticing some appealing books. If the librarian is there, take the opportunity to introduce yourself and your child. Librarians are typically keen to meet the incoming kindie students, and it gives your child another familiar adult face in the building.

Ultimately, this is a transition time for you and your child. Take an optimistic view but don’t expect instant success. Worries and fatigue are bound to surface at some point. “During those first few weeks, make the nights easy if you can,” Callie suggests. “Let your child have ‘down time’ after school and serve simple, healthy suppers. Get them to bed early and be positive about the next day. It’s a big adjustment for them, but they will get the hang of it soon enough.”

The post Dos and Don’ts for the Early Days of Kindergarten appeared first on The Mabelhood.

Firstly, it’s important to understand why you’re going. So many people have fought for the right to be at the Pride Parade. It’s not just a day for glitter and rainbows. So make sure that your reason for taking your child is genuine and not to play dress-up. Make sure your kids understand why the Parade takes place. For example, if you’re unfamiliar with the history, make sure you read this if you’re Canadian. And if you’ve been living under a rock, please make yourself aware of the Stonewall Riots in New York. The birthplace of Gay Pride and why so many people have more opportunities to celebrate freely today. 

Here is why we love attending Pride. and think it’s important for kids. Pride; why I bring my kid and you should too!

1) She is being raised in a heterosexual family: 

Two straight parents are raising her, and although we have gay friends, they’re all single so she doesn’t have a lot of exposure to different families. So she must learn that not all families look like ours, but they’re just as special and loving. 

2) She will see public displays of affection. 

My daughter doesn’t see gay couples expressing affection daily (and we even have gay friends), but they rarely show affection in public. The Pride Parade is a chance for her to see loving couples holding hands, kissing, and showing love and affection. I want her to see this; what better way of learning that love is love than seeing people passionately loving one another. 

3) She’ll see nudity

Will there be nudity? Yep, probably. My 5-year-old is a-okay with nudity (what young kid isn’t??) or “nakies,” as we call it. She will have an opportunity to see bodies of all shapes, sizes, and colors. Dancing, jiggling, and being proud. What better place to teach her body positivity than a group of happy people dancing in their beautiful skin.

4) It’s a Celebration AND a time to recognize 

It’s a time to celebrate and support those great strides and many sacrifices that have taken place in the LGBTQIA+ community. Having said this, I make sure that my daughter understands that this is a celebration, that the gay community is dressing up and celebrating a movement. The LGBTQIA+ community doesn’t always wander around daily wearing feather boas; they’re executives, doctors, teachers, parents, and respected members of our community who celebrate and have fun today.   

Things to consider about whether it’s right for you: 

1) You feel uncomfortable 

There is one thing to be said about getting out of your comfort zone. However, if you feel really uncomfortable, it’s not right to bring your child. If your un-comfort means you’re going to gawk, stare and be utterly shocked, please don’t go. It’s better for your child and the LGBTQIA+ community not to have that negativity. It’s a place to show support and respect, all while having fun and if you can’t do that, then don’t attend. Stay home this time, educate yourself, and hopefully, you can come and support with open eyes and an open mind next year. 

 2) Respect Boundaries

Like the straight community, sex is only one part of daily life. It doesn’t define the community. For example, at the Pride Parade, it’s not uncommon to see various kinks and sexually explicit outfits. If you have a child who is new to the community or just discovering or questioning, be mindful of their comfort level. Like those in the straight community, there are varying comfort levels with sex. 

If your child is at the beginning of their journey, it’s a lot to be confronted with sex far beyond their comfort level. Especially as their place in the LGBTQIA+ community may have nothing to do with sex. The Parade is a lot, and you don’t want to intimidate young people from opening up; we need young people to feel the community is approachable. It may be best to avoid the Parade and instead join some of the other fun, supportive events happening all month long. There are plenty of pride events that require less sexual exuberance and could be a great fit. 

We wish everyone a happy & safe pride month! We hope you have a fun, informative and loving month! To keep your kids safe in a big crowd, pick up some Silicone ID Bracelets! 

For more posts about Families attending Pride, check this one out!

The post Kids at the Pride Parade; Why I Bring My Kid and You Should Too! appeared first on The Mabelhood.

 1) Recharge

 Relax, take a walk, meditate and do the things you always dream of doing but never have the time or the privacy to do.

 2) Eat what you want 

 Enjoy the chance to cook meals that you love without complaints. Eat the spicy foods, the healthy meals, or the junk food you want without needing to share!

 3) Reconnect with your spouse 

 Go on dates, enjoy the alone time and use this as a time to reconnect with one another. The benefits the break from the kids will give you will do wonders for your relationship. And happy parents have happy kids

 4) Complete tasks always on your list

 Moms always have a to-do list that continuously grows, and we rarely ever check anything off. So use this time to check some things off your list! Finally clean out that closet, read recipes and meal prep freezer meals, paint the walls, rearrange the kitchen cupboards. Make your doctor appointments, get your car serviced, and repot the plants.

 5) Distance makes the heart grow fonder

You will miss your kids. But that’s not always a bad thing. A break will give you time to appreciate all the things about them that you love, but don’t always notice when you’re busy rushing around each day.

 6) Perspective. 

 Having time away from your kids can offer a new perspective. It can help clear your head and make room for revamped schedules and strategies and organization around the house.

 7) A brain break. 

 The mental toll of parenting can be draining. Use this time to focus on your mental health, work out or attend therapy. You’ll feel the difference in your patience levels when the kids return.

 8) Enjoy knowing they’re doing the right thing.

Your kids are getting a break from screen time without you needing to nag! They’re getting fresh air without you needing to encourage it. They’re meeting like-minded kids, getting a good night’s sleep, exercising, and having fun without YOU needing to facilitate it!

9) You will learn to trust your kids. 

 Seeing what they can accomplish when away is eye-opening. When kids are given a chance to grow more independent and learn to rely on themselves, it’s staggering what they can achieve (responsibility with sunscreen, keeping track of their gear- well, THIS HELPS!,  Brushing their hair, etc. Their abilities are far more extraordinary than we give them credit for; their skill set and self-esteem grow when they’re forced to be more independent.

 10) The benefits go beyond the summer. 

Camp is challenging for kids, and they grow a lot over a short period. In addition, they are gaining valuable life skills, from problem-solving to social skills, by being part of a camp community and working together and supporting one another. You will see a difference in your child when they return home, and the benefits far outweigh all of the worries you had before sending them to camp.

To make camp planning a little easier- don’t forget your sleepaway camp labels!

The post Ten Ways Moms Benefit from Sending Their Kids to Camp appeared first on The Mabelhood.

Here is a crash course on what I’ve learned about staying organized (being a cheer mom can be a full-time job on top of a regular full-time job). I learned through experience, and I want other newbie cheer moms to have an easier go – so follow these tips and you’ll go from rookie to All-star in cheer-mom organization!

There is much more to cheer than I imagined before signing my daughter up.  It’s a whole new world, a whole culture with new friends, new schedules, and new priorities. Not to mention new hairstyles, new clothing to buy, recent injuries to worry about, and fitness regimes to keep up with.

Create a schedule:

Start a homework schedule to ensure your child can manage practice while keeping up with their work. Training is mandatory for the success of the team, so it’s essential that you can manage both. Help your kids find a schedule that allows them to practice cheer, complete homework, and still get a good night’s sleep.

Get a planner:

Keep everything in your day planner; the schedules can quickly become hard to manage, and if you’re like me, writing things down is a must! So here is the best planner; you can customize it any way you like – and design it down to the color.

Practice hair and makeup:

Whether we like it or not, appearance is a big part of the cheer world. It took me some time to come around to the idea of putting my daughter in makeup. I’ve since learned the importance of it. Unfortunately, I’ve also had to teach myself to become good at it. There are videos like this one that can help you figure it out, and the veteran cheer moms are all so welcoming and happy to help.

Label Everything:

All the girls have identical items, from shoes to bows to makeup brushes, water bottles, and uniforms. Of course, it all must be labeled. I’ve been lucky enough to try out the NEW Mabel’s Labels Dance and Cheer Label Pack, and it’s been a game-changer for helping me stay organized. My daughter can quickly and easily spot her items, we no longer worry about germy water bottle swaps, and her bag is easy to identify. Plus, it’s all waterproof and machine washable, and dishwasher safe too.  Plus, they have ultra-cute cheer designs that girls all love!

Here is a quick pack list remember, everything is always labeled (top tip to be an organized Cheer Mom)!

-Snacks and protein bars and plenty of water!
-Ice packs and bandages (unfortunately, sprains and injuries happen)
-Pain relievers / first aid kit
-Knix Period-proof underwear (whether for my daughter or another girl who may get caught off guard)
-Portable charger (someone always forgets to charge)
-Bobby pins, hair ties, and hair spray
-Dry shampoo, portable flat iron
-Fabric tape, safety pins, and a small sewing kit

Follow the social media groups, and stay in contact!

If your squad has a social media group – follow it, join the parent’s what’s app group chat, and ensure you have everyone’s numbers. Sometimes things change, and you need to stay in the loop. So it’s imperative that you know what’s going on, what time, where people are meeting, and any other coaching changes that can be crucial information to have.

Avoid the drama

Remember that you’re the parent. Show good sportsmanship and support your team all along the way but remember that the coach always makes important decisions. Even when we don’t like or understand the choices they may make – we must respect them. Always be a good sports parent!

The post Organization Tips for a Rookie Cheer Mom appeared first on The Mabelhood.

In my opinion, millennials carry a heavier parenting burden than the previous generation because they are the first generation trying to break the cycle. We are the first generation that must deal with an abundance of information about how to raise children, making us question how we were raised and form our individualized parenting style.

We are the generation of social media. We are more self-aware and realize the importance of mental health and how our children’s formative years will impact their future relationships. Therefore, comparing our parenting style with our parents’ is natural. However, our children are growing up in a very different time than ours, and consequently, we feel we have no choice but to make some different choices.

What makes our jobs as parents harder is that we will often find that our first natural reaction to our child’s meltdown might exactly be the same as what our parents’ reaction to our meltdown had been. However, the cycle breakers would continue trying to reevaluate their reactions in their head and deal with them differently.

When I see my daughters, I see so much of myself in them. I also see how they are so much more. When I hear my six-year-old telling me how she feels irritated and anxious when I keep asking her to hurry up during school mornings, my instant reaction is to tell her to deal with it and do better because we need to reach the school on time. However, with practice and more self-awareness, I realize that it is refreshing to see my child understanding and expressing her emotions better than I ever could at that age. So, I reevaluate my reaction in my head, validate her feelings by telling her how I would feel the same in her situation, and discuss how we can try waking up a few minutes earlier next time so that our mornings do not feel rushed.

A therapist once gave me a tip, which has helped me immensely in trying to raise my children differently from our parent’s generation. She told me that our reactions to our children are often triggered by our childhood, which comes out when we become parents. For example, do you find yourself getting upset when your child screams? If yes, think about how your parent reacted to you or your siblings when they screamed. Were you punished or scolded for raising your voice? Think about how you as a child felt when your parents reacted that way. This exercise has helped me discover my childhood traumas and view situations from a different perspective.

Breaking the cycle that has been running for generations is hard work, and stressful. I applaud every parent that is trying every day to raise more empathetic, authentic, inclusive, opinionated, and self-loving kids. There is no right way to parent, and no childhood can be perfect. What matters at the end of the day is your connection with your child and how loved they feel for being exactly how they are. You are doing an amazing job, and your children are lucky to have you.

Click here for ways grandparents can have a positive effect on child development.

The post The Struggles of The Cycle Breakers appeared first on The Mabelhood.

As a mom, I do some things very well, but organizing elaborate social gatherings is not one of them. I admire those of you who are party-planning pros, since my skills and confidence in this area are minimal. The weeks leading up to the so-called “fun” event to celebrate my child’s glorious arrival into the world are filled with tension, overanalyzes, self-doubt, and a long list of tasks and errands intended to make everything “perfect.”

When you pause to think about it, it’s a little ironic. My child’s actual birth was (to put it delicately) an arduous experience for me. But does enduring those many hours of labor give me a free pass on the same date in every year that follows? No — just the opposite.

In my case, planning a large-scale party causes stress from a variety of angles, such as:

• Venue. I can’t afford an offsite birthday party involving trampolines, bowling, virtual reality, or laser tag. As a result, our kids’ parties were always held at home, which involved a lot of work to make everything presentable, reconfigure the furniture, and clean up afterward. As much as I wish I could be a laid-back host, I can’t stop fretting about things that could be spilled, stained, damaged, or broken.
• Food. I fear I will make a disastrous blunder, like running out of beverages or burning the meal. I want to be sensitive to my guests’ dietary requirements and allergies, but it does add to the cost and complexity of the menu. As for dessert, a custom-ordered cake is too expensive, and I don’t have the time or skill to create an edible masterpiece.
• Guest list. It takes thoughtful preparation to entertain and accommodate guests of all ages, from rambunctious young cousins to elderly grandparents. Depending on your child’s age, two separate events may be required: a “family” party for relatives plus a “friend” party with a few school pals. (If you’ve ever been the brave kindergarten parent who invited the entire class, I’m here to salute you — and pass you the Advil.)
• Timing. Parents of December babies, this one’s for you. The holiday season is busy enough, and jamming another gathering into the schedule may be impossible. Choosing an optimal date for a summer birthday party can also present a challenge when people are on vacation.
• Mixed messages. Some kids are naturally shy and uncomfortable being the center of attention, even on their birthdays. I’ve always felt awkward about the “gift circle,” where the birthday child unwraps each present in front of their spectating peers. If you’re trying to instill the values of unselfishness and generosity in your child, an overly indulgent birthday that’s “all about them” might be confusing and counterproductive.
• Resources. A production of this size requires extra time, money, and energy — none of which I have in reserve. On most days, I feel like I’m barely keeping up with life as it is. Single-handedly organizing a social event could be the proverbial straw that breaks the camel’s back. Our family budget is also stretched to its limit, so there’s no room for a big transaction from Party City for decorations and a Minion-shaped piñata.
• Guilt. When it comes to hosting (or not hosting) birthday parties, the guilt is real. We feel compelled to live up to the expectations from family, friends, and social media. We’ve been conditioned to believe it’s something that a “good parent” should do, and that it should be a lavish affair with an on-trend theme and homemade organic cake pops. Thanks for nothing, Pinterest.

After several years of parties that left me frazzled and deflated, I realized that my kids weren’t enjoying this annual tradition, either. During the festivities, they frequently displayed the classic symptoms of overstimulation — fussing, whining and clinging to me — causing an unwanted scene and making my hosting duties even more difficult.

It was my younger son who finally articulated what we were all feeling: “Mom, I don’t like birthday parties. It’s just… too much.”

That’s when it dawned on me: we don’t have to do a giant party. We have a choice.

For a time, the pandemic made large gatherings impossible (forbidden, even!) and for some of us it was a merciful reprieve. Maybe the break has caused you to re-evaluate if full-blown birthday parties are right for your family. If you’re looking for alternatives, here are some ideas:

Scale down.

Simplify things by having a small party with just a few VIP guests, such as grandparents or godparents.

Simplify the menu.

If feeding the group is a main source of angst, choose a different strategy. Host a brunch with muffins and coffee instead of a full-blown dinner. Recruit the master bakers in your circle to help out with dessert. Order pizza or takeout, if your budget allows. Whatever you decide, communicate the details to guests ahead of time, so they know what to expect. You can also simplify the loot bags, by choosing this cute custom, and inexpensive option.

Book some quality time.

Instead of an old-fashioned party, give the gift of a unique and personal experience. After my son voiced his concerns about birthday parties, we completely revamped our approach. One year, we took him skating and out for lunch; the next year, to the pet store to buy a goldfish. Another year, his grandma spent the day with him at a Legoland Discovery Centre, and the year after that, his cousins met up with us at Ripley’s Aquarium. These one-time experiences were decidedly more memorable and meaningful to him than any party.

Choose one friend.

Mark the occasion by inviting your child’s best buddy to a playdate, movie, or trip to the children’s museum. A two-person mini-party may be just the ticket for your child to relax and fully enjoy the experience.

Celebrate their “half-birthday”.

If your child’s birthday occurs at a busy time of year, calculate their half-birthday (6 months from their actual birthdate) to assess if it would provide better timing, availability, or weather.

Team up.

If you have more than one child, cut your hosting in half by combining their birthday celebrations. Or, join forces with extended family members born at a similar time of the year. You can cover multiple birthdays with one event and save money by doing a potluck or splitting the food bill.

Some people enjoy the grand scale of large-group birthday parties — I know a family who fondly refer to their gatherings as “cake and chaos.” On the other hand, if a big party feels stressful or excessive to you, you’re not alone. The song says “Happy Birthday,” not “Ulcer-Inducing Birthday” — so trust your instincts on what is right for you, and your child. By thinking outside the box, you might be able to have your cake and eat it, too.

Also, check-out these thoughts on Birthday Gifts and some Unique Loot Bag Ideas.

The post Am I A Horrible Parent if I Don’t Host a Giant Birthday Party For My Child? appeared first on The Mabelhood.

We often assume that our unconditional love is enough for our kids. We tell them we love them; we hug and kiss and say I love you daily. But what if we express love isn’t the same way they receive love? What if all the I love you’s don’t have the effect we think they do? Parents can often fall short of loving when we’re not doing it right for each kid.

Parents tend to show love to their kids in the ways they wish to receive love themselves. The same goes for siblings; each child will receive love differently, and what makes one child feel loved may not help another feel loved.

Parents need to be intentional about how they love their kids. Finding our kids’ love language can be a game changer in our relationships with them. Once parents have figured out their love language, it can change the temperament of their kids, make discipline easier, and make the household a little calmer.

Finding a love language benefits any relationship, but finding our kids’ love language can be tricky. It’s often not something you can figure out immediately, and you may need to play the long game. But it will pay off; once we’ve found their love language, we can better meet their needs emotionally.

The 5 Love Languages of Children is a book written by Dr. Gary Chapman. It’s gained immense popularity, changed households, and helped parents improve their relationships. Dr. Chapman describes the 5 love languages:

•  Words of Affirmation
•  Quality Time
•  Physical Touch
•  Gift Receiving
•  Acts of Service

We speak all of these love languages, but some are more important to us than others. We all have a primary love language, which we want to figure out with our kids. This information can help guide us to show love and find consequences and discipline that will work best for each kid, have a stronger, more understanding relationship, and better understand their behavior patterns.

To love your child the way they need to receive love, you must find their love language. So here are some tips for learning more and figuring it out. And, of course, read the book!

Words of Affirmation:

Do you see their face light up when you say how proud you are? Do they often tell you they love you? If they ask what you think of something they’ve done or they enjoy hearing your thoughts, their primary love language is likely words of affirmation.

What it looks like:

This language is praise, encouragement, and words of affection to show love.

•  I love you  
•  Great job on your test today 
•  You’re a great sister to your siblings 
•  You’ve been so helpful today 
•  You’re important to me 
•  I love how your mind works 
•  You inspire me

These words can be incredibly meaningful for kids who love language is words of affirmation. Even little notes in their lunchbox can be significant for them.

Important things to note: 

Affirm our kids for the effort rather than for perfection.

Even if this is their love language, we must be aware not to praise only what they do perfectly but the effort they put into it. We can use this to motivate and get the best out of them, but in a way that praises what they’ve done – (even if it’s not as good as you were hoping for). Our words mean so much to our kids, even more so when their love language is words of affirmation.

Be aware of…

Words are powerful, especially if this is your love language.

Negative words given to a child whose love language is words of affirmation can hurt. They can have difficulty recovering from the words that hurt them so much. So be careful when you speak to them, and don’t be afraid to apologize.

It’s probably NOT their love language if…

Everyone loves compliments, but some kids don’t need them to feel loved, happy, or confident. Sometimes you can praise a kid, and they’ll feel embarrassed or brush it off. If this is the case, it’s likely NOT their love language.

Quality Time:

If your child is often asking for some alone time with you, if they’re calling you to come to see what they’re doing or play a game with you – they likely have quality time as their primary love language.

What it looks like:

Undivided attention! The most important thing these kids want is our attention. The amount of time doesn’t need to be significant, but this time needs to be quality.

-Quality time, as much as you can manage.

-Activities together; sports events, making crafts, reading together

Important things to note…

We live in a multi-tasking world; we don’t have enough hours to get everything done. So, we must find creative ways to find this quality time for our kids without distractions. For older kids, perhaps the morning commute to school or sports is a time to talk (no phones, radio, just chatting). For younger kids, possibly take 5 minutes each morning to eat breakfast together or a few minutes after school to play a game of their choice.

Be aware of…

We’re so used to multi-tasking these days, and we mustn’t do this with kids whose love language is quality time. So if they’ve asked you for time, perhaps to come and play, and you’ve brushed them off a few times, it can be exceedingly hurtful to a child whose love language is quality time.

The time must be undivided. Don’t have your phone; looking at your phone or taking a call can make a quality time child believe that they’re not as important as your phone is.

Physical Touch:

Kids with physical touch as their primary love language will reciprocate the physical touch. For example, they often hold hands, ask for back rubs, or snuggle on the couch.

What it looks like:

Everything from hugs, kisses, cuddles, and hand-holding to back scratches, roughhousing and tickles. If you find your child has no issues or embarrassment about loving in public, they like to hug friends and hold your hand; then it’s likely that physical touch is their love language.

Important things to note…

From the very first moment, we show our love to our new babies through physical touch. This is why Kangaroo care is so critical. Hugs, cuddles, kisses, this is how we express love. And the sloppy wet baby kisses we get back are amazing. Some kids grow out of being overly affectionate, and others can’t get enough snuggles.

Also, many parents pull away physically as their kids age, especially if it isn’t your love language; it may feel unnatural. So, it’s essential to do your best to continuously show affection to our kids whose love language is physical touch. You need to be intentional about the touch – even if it’s uncomfortable or unnatural. Especially as your kids get older, you can make it a back scratch or a hand on the shoulder.

Be aware of…

Some kids grow out of the physical touch, especially special needs kids, it can make them uncomfortable.

Also, if you have daughters whose love language is physical touch, it’s essential to continue to hug and hold them, primarily through puberty. Pulling back from your daughters increases their feeling of shame about their bodies.

 Gift Receiving:

Kids with gift receiving as their love language appreciate even the smallest gifts. They take good care of things people have given, often keeping them in a special spot. If this sounds like your child, gift receiving may be their primary love language.

What it looks like…

•  Picking them up a small item that you think they’d like
•  breakfast in bed, a picnic or outing
•  buying a toy together
• Surprising them with adorable labels
•  Finding a rock or shell in their favorite shape or color

Important things to note:

Let’s be upfront with this. Having gift receiving as your love language does not make anyone materialistic. It’s more about tokens of love, a physical item that can become a keepsake.

Be aware of…

If this is their love language, and you don’t give a birthday gift, they’ll take that to heart. It doesn’t need to be expensive; it needs to be a gesture as long as you thought of them when you saw it – they’ll feel loved.

 Acts of Service:

This one can be tricky to figure out because, as parents, it’s our job to provide acts of service for our kids. But a few tell-tale signs can help you figure out if they ask you to do something for them that they can do themselves; they appreciate thoughtful gestures. It could be something like fluffing their pillow or putting their socks on. They can do it themselves, but they appreciate the gesture when you do it.

What it looks like… 

•  Doing chores together
• Doing your best to use their favorite cup when you can.
• Working together on tasks around the house
• Helping them clean their room.
• Buttoning their jacket when they ask, even if they can do it themselves.

Important things to note… 

 An easy way to recall the importance of acts of service is by reminding yourself that actions speak louder than words to your child.

Be aware of…

Don’t do everything for them; you don’t want this to turn into them not learning to do their tasks. Instead, treat it as an opportunity to teach them life skills by doing them together.

Finding your child’s love language can make life easier for everyone; loved kids are happy kids. Even if you can’t figure it out – if you show love in any of these ways, your kids are lucky, and you will have a loving household. Inevitably, we will need to discipline our kids, motivate them to make smart choices, and provide consequences when required. Knowing your child’s love language can help with this. Wrap your discipline in their love language. When they feel loved, they’ll take the consequence better and feel the discipline is fairer.

You’re never too late to start figuring out or acting upon their love language and making changes. Maybe you can’t quite figure it out – try showing them the different types of love and see the reactions you get. If your kids are older, you can have them take the quiz themselves to find their love language.

Also, Name Labels should be their own love language, right!?

The post Finding Your Child’s Love Language: Loving Your Kids How They Need to Be Loved. appeared first on The Mabelhood.